Renowned guitar collector Joe Bonamassa is receiving accolades for rescuing a pristine 1965 Gibson ES-335 from a life of intense punk performances, according to posts on guitar forums.
“I went to one of my usual blues spots, hoping to jump in for a guest solo, but was surprised to find a punk band on stage,” Bonamassa recounted, visibly emotional. “The guitarist was shredding on this flame maple-top ES-335 with patent number humbuckers while the audience thrashed about, likely in frustration at the guitar’s treatment. I knew I had to intervene to save it from such abuse.”
Lowell Majowski, the guitarist for the indie punk band Staff Only, remains perplexed by his encounter with Bonamassa.
“This guy, looking like a mix of Guy Fieri and a hedge fund manager, approached me mid-song and offered $32,000 in cash for the guitar. I took it without thinking,” Majowski explained, noting that the guitar was a gift from his late uncle. “My uncle loved this guitar and always talked about passing it down, but honestly, I just want to play a Schecter. Those guitars are awesome. The Gibson didn’t handle chugging well and kept pulling my arm hairs out with its f-holes. He might want to consider vacuuming it out or something.”
Experts in the vintage guitar community highlight the significance of actions like Bonamassa’s.
“Thank goodness Joe stepped in to save this exquisite instrument,” said Paul Rockford, owner of Paul’s Diamond Guitars. “While I usually support the free market, it’s time for some oversight regarding this type of abuse. No guitar should have to endure sweat, heavy power chords, or the chaos of a rowdy crowd. They deserve to be showcased in glass cases or used for gentle blues riffs with minimal distortion.”
In related news, Bonamassa has reportedly been banned from Guitar Centers across the country for pressuring customers to avoid purchasing pedals.
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